Music:Shhh, the baby is sleeping...
Mood:In love :sigh:

I love our baby!!!
I love it when he smiles, even though it may not mean anything; I love it when he coos when he's happy, I love it when he stares at me with his big eyes; I love it when he snorts when he's so hungry that he can't coordinate himself to nurse properly and then gets more frustrated and snorts more; I love it when he sneezes; I love his sweet breath; I love his long eyelashes; I love his mohawk; I love his long toes; I love his furry ears; I love his perfect lips that don't look anything like the ultrasound photo; I love how he sleeps so much better on my belly than in the crib; I love how long it takes to type a blog entry with one hand because I can't put him down...
Am I a proud mom or what?

We took Ethan on his first real outing (other than the pediatrician) the other day. Where did we go? Wal-Mart, of course. More importantly we tested the baby sling. He loves it! I'll have to put a picture up sometime. He's already getting big for it and I know we'll have to upgrade to big baby size soon. With the way he's eating he's sure to surpass Seth by next week. :D
But hey, I'm glad he's doing well. He lost so much weight that the doctor had us introduce formula to get him eating and pooping so the jaundice would go away. I was not very happy about that since we had just gotten the hang of breast feeding and as he took the bottle more and more, the less he would take the breast. I just about gave up on it, sadly, because that was the last thing I want (but then again, an epidural was also the last thing I wanted going into the delivery and it turned out to be a good thing. A very good thing. :) And this turned out okay too. Once he started to gain weight, we again focused on the breast feeding, even calling in a lactation consultant. She did the trick, and now Ethan is an awesome eater. The next challenge is getting him to sleep in the crib...

Music: First Day of My Life: Bright Eyes (such a good song! Download it off Shareza but don't buy the album; Bright Eyes is generally not uplifting. Definitely falls in the emo category.)
Mood: anticipatory

So...

I'm in labor!
I was asked last night at a tour of the labor and delivery ward at the hospital by another midwife patient, who is due on monday, after finding out I was almost a week overdue: "How do you deal with waiting?"
What else is there to do?
So I waited. We went to the midwife yesterday for a non stress test (where they check the baby's heartbeat as it relates to it's activity to see if it's still healthy) and an ultrasound to see if there was still enough fluid around the baby. The NST was fine; our little kicker was super active. (120 BPM baseline: it's a boy, eh?) The ultrasound was fine too, if anything there's too much fluid around the baby. No one would say if that was a definite indication of problems but we're supposed to go back tomorrow ( if I haven't birthed yet) to re-evaluate the fluid. We could see it moving around, and we're like :"Ohhh, that's what's going on in there when my tummy looks like a tidal wave." I always wondered. Then the midwife checked to see if I was dilated (only 1-2 cms) and said things weren't quite ready yet but soon. I went home not expecting to see the baby until next week. I went to bed, then during the night got up to use the bathroom. For some reason I decided to turn the light on and just happened to see....a little plug ( I won't be too graphic). I went back to bed and had a couple contractions during the night. Around 8 I called the midwife and she said it definitely is labor and to just hang in there. Right.
I've been trying. At first I had no idea how quickly things would go so I rushed around the house trying to get ready: packing, making a meal, doing dishes. They progressed from 20 seconds long to 30 seconds long by noon, still sporadically, depending on my activity. I laid down after lunch and that seemed to slow things down a bit. Ed and I went for a short walk around the block before the sun went down, then had dinner, opting for take out in case my water broke in the restaurant. Walking felt really good, or maybe it was the fresh air. (What a beautiful day to have a baby on!)
I've been sitting down trying to blog for a couple hours, distracted by the contractions. I think I need to get up an move again since they seemed to slow down. I waited almost forty minutes between two, and that's no good. I gotta get to 1-2 minutes apart before I can go to the hospital. Fortunately the baby used to break to get in his exercise, so I know he's okay. I, on the other hand, am tired. I want to try and sleep soon but I'll do some laps in our apartment first.

Pray for us!

Mood: mourning
Music: Jack Johnson: If I Could

"They say that new life makes losing life easier to understand....One goes out, one comes in"

I want to offer comfort but I don't know how. I can only say that I have no doubt of God's future blessings upon you (Psalm 127:3). We love you, Shawn and Tammy.

I almost feel bad in having a baby right now, but I remember that this timing is nothing less than perfect. It's easier to say on my end because I receive the blessing rather than the loss. And for what? Our child was conceived in sin in more ways than one. "The great God that formed all things both rewardeth the fool, and rewardeth transgressors." (Proverbs 26: 10) God's benevolence is so inconceivable.

Music: Psalm 6
Mood: eager

Hey I learned latin/french today: I am enceinte, meaning I am in the advanced stages of pregnancy. Enceinte. It's fun to say. Try it. I also learned another word. Here's a sentence, try to figure out what it means. Or just cheat and click on it to see the definition. "After a long wait, probably more difficult for the Andersons than for us, we gave thanks to God for Tammy was found fecund." As sad as I am to give up being a Pregnancy Princess, I'm super glad Tammy is going to take over it. :D

The ladies on LOC have been giving advice on how to prepare for marriage. Though I'm past that stage, it's never to late to learn and to make the most of every day with your husband/wife. I know I especially need to do this, for my gracious and loving husband has put up with so much from me; the absolute bare minumum he deserves is an equally loving and submissive wife. I don't have much to offer him in terms of skills, for I certainly wasted my youth on things that are meaningless now ( like television). Fortunately God gave me months of free time without having to work before the baby comes to redeem that time. Like Cheryl said, reading books is an excellent way to get caught up on how to keep a home, raise a child, teach, cook, garden, etc. Plus I have ladies in the church to ask advice and a mother in law who is an expert housekeeper. So if you're a girl who has not gotten married yet and has not been born into a family that has taught her these skills, I suggest you get cracking!

Five books I recommend that address the areas I need strengthening in are:
1. What to Expect the First Year - since the most experience I had changing diapers was working at Albany Medical Center changing elderly people, I definetely needed a refresher. This teaches breastfeeding, what you need for a baby, how he/she develops and what to look for, common problems so you don't make enemies with your on call pediatricion, and so much more that is vital in a reference book.
2. A Well-Trained Mind - again, my experience of being homeschooled (for one year) was....well, pathetic, as I had no self-discipline. And I certainly had never heard of classical education. This is a good book on homeschooling, but don't let it overwhelm you. You don't have to follow it exactly to give your kid a better education than a public school could, just pick and choose what works best for you and your quiver. Chances are they are all going to need you at the same time and Child #6 is not going to get that hour of one-on-one reading time with you that they suggest.
3. The Covenanted Reformation Defended... - as a main stream Christian coming from non-denominationalism into the reformed convenanter church, I had no knowledge of our distinctives or why we should even have any. There are many theology books out there that would be useful to read, but especially this one as it's written by one of our elders and specifically addresses issues often brought against us, that we might better defend our faith, even against other Christians.
4. The Act, Declaration and Testimony - hand in hand with CovRefDef, this is a good book to read about the Covenanters, adding a concise history. It's also one of our subordinate standards and a strongly suggested read by our elders if you become a communicate member, just so you know what you're agreeing to uphold.
5. Female Piety - an excellent read that inspires you to be the best wife ever! Also how to practically live as a single Christian woman. If only I could so easily put it into practice...

I've either gone through or am reading each of these now, taking advantage of having to put my feet up everyday. Especially reading A Well-Trained Mind has rekindled a desire to read more. The best way to encourage a love of reading in your kids is to set the example yourself. And even though I wasn't classically educated, that doesn't mean I can't ever be. I may never go back to school but I will learn, and for the rest of my life. My husband is a wonderful example of how self-motivation and the right books and resources can teach you things that will take you just as far or farther than any traditional classroom could. He's never taken a computer class but learned everything he knows on his own, from reading and messing around. Not only does he have an awesome job, he could rival any candidate with a degree in a interview for a job in what he knows.

All this to say that God has commanded us to redeem the time. I don't have to excuse myself for not having been taught all I when I was young what I need to know now, but I do have to do something about it and there's no reason not to go after it when the resources are so abundant.